Black Flames
by Vera-Sama
Summary: Schwarz recieves what could be their most difficult mission yet. Nagi recieves repeated nosebleeds, and Schuldig meets one of the few women not interested in him. Humor and fluff all around. My first Schwarz-centered fic, please R&R.
1. A New Mission

Disclaimer: I want to own Weiss Kruez. drools over mental image of eight bishies to do my bidding But I don't. cries as thought bubble pops

AN: Ok…I know there are other fics I need to be working on, but come on! Was I supposed to let such a well developed idea slip out of my head? Besides, I've been in such a WK mood lately. I'm working on this, two separate (more then likely one shot) humor fic ideas, and 'Fremdgehen'…plus, I've got an idea for another Schwarz centered fic. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about the rest of my fics…I just need to get more ideas on them. Now, on to my first Schwarz-Centric fic.

* * *

Chapter One – "A New Mission"

Smoke filled the small apartment as Michiyo made her way to her brother's room. "Ranji! Ranji!" She called. She forced the door open, coughing slightly. She saw a frail looking man with white-silver hair. "Ranji! Wake up! We have to get out!" She began to pull him to his feet.

"What's going on, Michi?" He asked, opening his eyes.

"Come on….if we don't hurry we won't make it."

Ranji pulled himself to his feet, leaning on his sister for support. Michiyo pulled him out the door. As they reentered the smoke filled hallway, Ranji began to cough.

"Just hold on." She begged. "We'll get you out of here."

She had just stumbled out the door of the building when the firefighters arrived.

"What happened, miss?" One asked as a group of others ran inside.

"I fell asleep, and forgot to turn the stove off." Michiyo lied. "My brother needs help…he's sick."

It was a few hours later before she could talk to her brother alone.

"I'm so sorry…" She said, lowering her face, unable to look at her brother surrounded by hospital equipment. "I dreamt about Mama…and I remembered what Papa said. When I woke up, the room was on fire."

"Don't get upset Michi." The man replied. "It's not your fault."

"Yes it is. Because of me, we don't have a home."

Ranji started to reply, but began to cough roughly. When he didn't catch his breath after a moment, Michiyo became concerned.

"Ranji?" She asked, standing and moving to his side. It was now she noticed there was blood in the hand he'd covered his mouth with.

She paged the nurse, and was sent outside while they worked. A few moments later, her brother was wheeled from his hospital room.

"What's happening?" She asked.

"The doctor feels the need to operate. We'll keep you posted." Was all the nurse said before leaving.

'This is all my fault.' She thought with a sigh, despising herself, and her unwanted gift.

* * *

Nagi slumped low in his chair. Why was health mandatory? It was so boring. All he wanted to do was go home, boot up his computer, and tune out Schuldig and Farfarello as much as possible until Crawford made him go to bed.

"Good afternoon, class."

"Good afternoon, Sakamoto-Sensei." The class chorused.

Nagi looked up, a smile almost gracing his face. The one thing that made this class bearable was Sakamoto-Sensei. She had replaced the previous health teacher at the start of the semester. She was young, well, early twenties at least, and quite pretty. All the guys thought so.

"I hope you are all looking forward to the upcoming break, I know I am." The teacher smiled. "As I'm sure you all know, since it will be the start of a new semester, we'll be starting a new section once you return."

Nagi blinked. She couldn't mean…?

"I'm sure by now there isn't much I can teach you that television hasn't already, however I still have to teach it." She faced the class with a very serious face. "I expect you to all act very mature this coming semester while we cover Sex Education."

Nagi gave a small sigh. He now remembered why he wasn't looking forward to this subject.

"Now, there are some new textbooks that go along with this subject." She motioned to a stack of books in the corner. "Can someone please take up the old books? Midori-san, would you?"

"Yes, Sakamoto-Sensei." A girl with black hair and bright green eyes stood and began to collect the books.

"I'd like to go ahead and pass out the new books today, so we can jump right in when we get back." The teacher moved to the corner and began to pick up the new books. "I may need some help…Naoe-san?"

"Yes, Sakamoto-Sensei." Nagi said with a small sigh. Why him of all the people in the class? He stood and moved to the corner, taking some of the new textbooks.

* * *

Youji had just started to pull the grate down when a woman walked up.

"I know those legs!" He exclaimed, raising the gate again to greet a woman with shoulder length silver hair and blue eyes. "Michiyo-san! I was beginning to think you dumped me for a new florist."

Michiyo laughed. "Is it too late for me to pick something up?" She asked.

"Of course not, Michiyo-san." Omi said, coming up to greet the woman. "For you, I'm sure we can stand to stay open a little longer."

"You're so sweet, Omi-san." She said, beaming at the teen.

"Youji, I thought I said to close up." Aya said as he came in.

"I'm sorry, Aya-san, I had a meeting, and couldn't come any sooner." Michiyo gave the redhead an apologetic bow. "I won't be long."

"Alright…but don't make a habit of it." Aya said, less annoyance showing in his voice then usual. She bought a bouquet once every two weeks for the last three years, how could Aya turn away such a regular?

"What will it be today?" Omi asked. "The usual?"

"No…I think I want something different." She smiled. "Today's a special day, after all."

"Hey…isn't today your birthday?" Ken asked after a moment of thought. He remembered her asking for something special around this time last year, and the year before.

"Sure is…and my brother's too." She replied. "I need something special for his grave to celebrate."

"I think I know just the thing!" Omi said as he ran off to gather the flowers.

"Hey, Michiyo-san…" Youji said, slipping an arm around her shoulders. "What do you say we celebrate your birthday together?"

"Youji, if she turns you down every time you ask, why do you keep trying?" Ken asked.

"So sue me, I'm determined." Youji replied before looking at the woman for an answer.

"Thank you, Youji-san…but no thank you." She replied. "I'm not looking for a relationship right now."

Omi returned with two identical bouquets. "Here you go, Michiyo-san."

"They're beautiful…but I only need one."

"Consider it a buy one, get one." Aya said, coming very close to a smile.

"I think that's Aya's way of saying Happy Birthday." Ken added.

"Thank you…all of you." She paid for the flowers and turned to go. "I'll let you guys close up now." She said with a smile.

As she was leaving, she passed a woman with bright red hair. 'Another regular, perhaps?' She pondered before continuing on her way.

* * *

Nagi sighed as he entered the house he shared with the other members of Schwarz. He mentally prepared himself for the usual activities; Schuldig annoying him from the moment he entered, Farfarello sitting to one side, cleaning his knives, and Crawford locked away in his office.

Instead, he found all three of his teammates sitting in the living room, a very serious feeling in the air. This type of feeling usually accompanied very difficult missions.

"What's going on?" He dared to ask after a moment.

"New mission, Chibi." Schuldig replied, his usual smirk present on his face.

"Who's the target?"

Crawford passed him a picture. Nagi looked it over. It was a young woman with shoulder length white-silver hair and deep, midnight blue eyes. Nagi blinked for a moment. "Sakamoto-Sensei?"

* * *

AN: Ok…So I know not much happened plot wise here, but it's coming, I promise. Please R&R and let me know how things are going so far. I promise things will pick up in the next chapter.

I'm not very familiar with how Japanese school systems work, so I'm kinda basing everything on American high school. Also…Nagi's name is Naoe, isn't is?


	2. The Conference

AN: I've been discussing this fic with my muse, and we've come to the decision that any notions of a serious fic should be thrown out the window right this moment. I've got some serious ideas, and the basic plot will be pretty straightforward, but as always, the need to laugh outweighs all else. I hope you guys are enjoying this.

* * *

Chapter Two – "The Conference"

"Well class, today will be our last time meeting until after the holidays." Michiyo said with a smile. "I've already handed out the new books, and given back all of your work so far, so feel free to consider today a Study Day. However, if you have nothing to study, feel free to talk quietly amongst yourselves."

Nagi sighed, watching his teacher nervously. 'Today's the day.' He thought. 'We carry out the mission as soon as class is over.' He knew that a mission was a mission, but this still wasn't an idea he was fond of. He sighed again, pulling out a book, he tried to read, but kept looking around instead. All around him, students were quietly discussing their plans for Christmas. At the front of the room, Sakamoto-Sensei was working on what appeared to be lesson plans.

A few minutes before the end of class, there was a knock at the classroom door. Michiyo went to answer it, not recognizing the man on the other side.

"Sakamoto-san?" the man asked.

Nagi looked up. 'Schuldig?'

"Yes…can I help you?" Michiyo replied.

"I was hoping to talk with you, concerning Nagi Naoe." Schuldig's face showed concern, but he spoke a little too loud, enjoying the looks Prodigy was receiving from the other students.

"I usually save such matters for after school." She replied.

As if on cue, the last bell of the day rang.

"Oh, well, class dismissed." She fumbled for a moment. "Happy Holidays, everyone."

The class left in a large mass, Nagi trying to sneak away with the rest. Schuldig, who had moved to one side to let everyone by, grabbed him by the arm, and pulled him aside. "Not so fast, Chibi. You need to be here too."

Nagi grumbled, but allowed himself to be held back. Once everyone left, Schuldig pushed the door closed. Michiyo looked at her desktop colander.

"I don't see any conferences scheduled for today." She commented.

"Oh silly me, I suppose I forgot to call." Schuldig said, shaking his head. "That is alright, isn't it? I was just so concerned about Nagikins."

Nagi shot the German a rather evil glare.

"There's nothing really out of the ordinary." Michiyo commented. "Naoe-san turns in all off his work on time, takes part in class discussions and group projects, never speaks out of turn, and is always very polite. He's one of the best students I've had this semester."

Nagi blushed slightly. Schuldig smirked.

'She is cute, Chibi…too bad you're not a few years older, ne?'

'Shut up!'

"I must admit, I am surprised." Michiyo continued, unaware of their mental conversation. "I would've thought Nagi was full Japanese."

"What do you mean?" Nagi asked.

"Well, it's just I didn't know your father was foreign. Especially given your last name."

Schuldig blinked. "I'm not the Chibi's father. I'm more of an…older brother figure."

Nagi gave a small laugh. If that was what siblings were like, he was glad he didn't have any.

"Is there anything else I can help you with?" Michiyo asked. She had wanted to visit Ranji's grave before it got dark.

"What subject is this?" Schuldig asked, looking around the room with interest.

"Health Education."

"Ah…isn't this where we send innocent young minds to learn about the birds and the bees?"

Michiyo blushed a bit. "If you mean Sex Education, then yes. We'll be starting on that after the break."

"If you ever need…a research partner…just let me know." Schuldig smiled, slowly approaching the teacher. He could tell she felt increasingly nervous.

"That…won't be necessary…" She stammered, now leaning against her desk, trapped if he got any closer.

"Well tell me…do you offer tutoring for non-students?" He advanced a little more, leaning over her ever so slightly.

Michiyo was nervous. 'Please back off…' She begged silently. 'When I get nervous…'

Just then, a small pile of papers on the desk caught fire. Schuldig stepped back, proud of his work. Michiyo spun around, knocking the papers into a small trashcan with one quick motion. Schuldig suppressed a laugh when the trashcan blazed up, apparently full of paper as well. Michiyo began to panic, forgetting that Nagi and Schuldig were even there.

"There's no water." She grumbled, eyes scanning the room.

"Here, Sakamoto-Sensei." Nagi said, levitating a fire extinguisher to her.

"Thank you, Naoe-san." She said, taking it and putting out the small fire, without noticing she'd grabbed it from mid air. She then froze, turning slowly to face the other two.

"You two just saw all of that…didn't you?"

They both nodded. She sat down the fire extinguisher, and sank into her desk chair. 'I've ruined everything…again.' She thought.

"Nothing's been ruined." Schuldig replied, kneeling down to look at her from the other side of the desk. "In fact, things just got a lot better for you."

"How did you…?"

"Know what you were thinking?" Schuldig finished. "Call it a gift. Like you're only…less of a fire hazard."

'This can't be real…' She thought, her eyes going from the foreigner to Nagi.

"It's quite real. I'm a telepath, you're pyrokenetic, and the Chibi can float stuff."

"You could call it levitation." Nagi snapped crossing his arms. "'Float' makes me think of ice cream."

Schuldig laughed again. "Nagikins wants to take you out for ice cream sometime."

"Schuldig! Did you have to tell her that?" Nagi demanded.

"Let's say there's some off chance I do believe you…" Michiyo began, watching the two. "Why are you here?"

"Because we understand how you feel." Schuldig's voice sounded sympathetic. "We know about everything…and everyone you've lost because of your gift, and we want to offer you something stable to hold on to."

She thought of Ranji. How would he handle this? What would he suggest she do?

"We want to offer you something you haven't had since your brother died…" Schuldig continued.

"A place to truly belong." Nagi finished.

Michiyo looked at her hands for a moment, before looking up at Schuldig. "Tell me more."

* * *

Michiyo looked at the moderate house before her. It had been a few days since she met Schuldig, and now she was preparing to officially join Schwarz. Readjusting the weight of her overnight bag, she continued up the walk, glancing nervously at Nagi every few minutes.

"Don't worry." Schuldig smiled. "It might seem…unusual…at first, but you'll soon adjust to life here."

He opened the door and lead her into a cozy living room.

"When will I meet the others?" She asked as she looked around the room.

"Oi, Bradley, Farf, all hands on deck!" Schuldig called.

"What have I told you about calling me that?" Crawford asked, entering the room from his office. His glasses had a faint glow, proving he was already annoyed.

A moment later, Farfarello entered and stood silently, staring at Michiyo. Michiyo looked Crawford over, but wasn't very impressed. She stopped when her eyes landed on Farfarello. His hair was the same shade as her own. That was the most her mind could register.

"Ranji?" She asked in a whisper, bolting forward without another thought and throwing her arms around him. A moment later, she looked up, and midnight blue met golden amber.

"Have we met…?" He asked, tilting his head.

Michiyo took a few stumbling steps backwards. "I'm…sorry…" She said weakly. "You remind me o someone."

"Perhaps we should let Sakamoto-Sensei rest." Nagi suggested. "Moving can be tough."

"Follow me." Crawford ordered.

He lead her out of the room, and down a hallway. They passed an office and a kitchen before he began pointing things out to her.

"Along that wall we have Farfarello room, Schuldig's room, and a weaponry storage room." He said, motioning. "Here we have my room, the room you will be staying in, and Nagi's room. The bathroom is at the end of the hall on the right. To the left is a smaller den. Farfarello usually sits in there to polish his knives, but it's also a nice place to read."

Michiyo moved for her room.

"We don't have a specific dinnertime, but I will make sure someone lets you know when it's time to eat." Crawford continued. "The rules are simple. Don't call me by my first name. If you feel the need to address me, it's either Crawford of Oracle. Do not under any circumstances mention religion around Farfarello…unless you enjoy mass homicide. Feel free to use your power if Schuldig gets too…friendly, as long as you do not damage anything." He pushed his glasses up on his nose. "And most importantly, you're the only woman here. Knock before entering any room with a closed door, even if you just left it a moment earlier. Also, seeing as how we only have one bathroom, please make sure no one will need in there before hand if you are preparing for a shower."

"Yes, Crawford-san." Michiyo replied. "Please excuse me."

Crawford sighed as she went into her room. He hoped his little speech might make things go smoother, but he didn't have to be a Precog to know as long as he was with Schwarz, nothing would go smoothly.

* * *

Schuldig had been on his way to his room when he caught an intriguing train of thought. Following it for a moment, he discovered Michiyo was dreaming about her family. He stood just inside her doorway, curious to see how things would play out.

"_Those children are evil, both of them!" Tsuuhei Sakamoto exclaimed, motioning to the five-year-old boy and his six-year-old sister._

"_They're not evil…they just have special gifts they can't control." Amae replied, resting a hand on her young daughters head._

_Tsuuhei growled softly before backhanding his wife. Ranji stumbled back as well._

"_Please, Papa…that hurts Ranji too…" Michiyo said, wrapping her arms around her brother who had started crying._

Schuldig shook his head. 'Rough time…'

_Michiyo looked from her brother to her mother, both lying on hospital beds. One was dying of cancer, and the other felt the constant pain, without suffering from the actual disease._

"_Mama…I'm sorry…"_

"_Don't blame yourself, Michi." Amae said, smiling weakly. "Just promise me you'll take care of Ranji. He needs you."_

"_I promise." She said._

_She kissed her mother's cheek, quietly checked on her sleeping brother and then left the hospital room, running into her father._

"_I hope you're proud of yourself." Tsuuhei said with a sneer. "Your mother's dying, and it's all your fault."_

"_That's not true!" Michiyo replied._

"_As long as you live, you're not going to do anything but cause everyone around you to suffer. Well, I've suffered for sateen years, and that's long enough for me."_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_They're releasing that freak of a brother of yours tomorrow morning. You two will move to another apartment in another complex." Tsuuhei glared at his daughter. "Once you get there, you're on your own. I never want to see either of you again."_

Michiyo bolted upright, tears streaming down her face. She then noticed Schuldig.

"So what happened?" He asked.

She briefly considered not answering, but decided against it. She needed to tell someone.

"My mother died that night, and my brother never fully recovered, physically or emotionally. We moved out like Papa told us to, and continued going to school. I got a job at a local grocery store in order to pay rent." She sighed. "Everything went fine until Ranji died." Memories of that terrible night fleshed through her mind.

"Say no more." Schuldig assured. "I still don't understand why your brother was sick."

"He was an empath. He felt other people's pain as if it were his own." She explained. "Papa always hated us, and I never knew why…"

"People like that hate what they don't understand. It's easier to ridicule then to try and comprehend." Schuldig replied.

"Speaking from personal experience?"

He laughed. "Come on, I bet you're hungry."

Michiyo stood to follow but stopped. "What about…Farfarello? I hugged him and called him my dead brother's name. Won't he consider that odd?"

Schuldig laughed. "Farfie's bonkers...why'd you think he's Berserker. Don't worry about him, chances are he's already forgotten."

Michiyo smiled and followed him out. When they arrived at the kitchen, they found Nagi doing homework, and Farfarello writing what looked like a letter.

"I'm glad to see you're up, Sakamoto-Sensei." Nagi said with a smile.

"I was thinking." She said as she sat down at the table. "Perhaps…since we're going to be living together now…we should drop the formalities away from school."

"Good idea, Michikins…now Nagikins can call you some cute little pet name." Schuldig said with a smirk

"Shut up, Schuldig." Nagi grumbled before looking at his teacher. "What would you like me to call you?"

"Michiyo-chan is fine." She decided with a smile. "Sound good to you, Nagi-kun?"

"Hai…" He stammered before thinking. 'She called me Nagi-kun…'

Without warning, Nagi broke out in a mild nosebleed.

'Ecchi Chibi.' Schuldig smirked.

* * *

AN: For lack of a better term, Nagi went off to a teenage boy happy place. be warned, the poor kid will probably need a transfusion before all is said and done. More will come soon, including further details of her new status in Schwarz, and the return of everyone's favorite florists. Also, I'm going to do a Christmas chapter…even if it's not up by Christmas. 


	3. A Black Christmas

AN: Well, here's Chapter three. Please forgive the pun in the title, I couldn't resist.

* * *

Chapter Three "A Black Christmas" (1)

"I'm going out!" Michiyo called, pulling on her coat.

"Where are you going?" Crawford asked, looking up from his newspaper.

"There are only three shopping days until Christmas, and I still have people to buy for." She explained.

"Are you going to the mall?" Farfarello asked.

"Yes, would you like to come?"

Farfarello thought for a moment before nodding. "Schuldig forgot to mail my letter to Santa, so I suppose I'll just go straight to the source."

'Letter to Santa?' She wondered.

'Just go with it…' Schuldig advised. He stood in the doorway. "Why don't Chibi and I come too? I can drive, and I'm sure Nagikins would like to get out of the house."

"Alright." She agreed. "I could probably use help carrying the bags."

"You coming, Bradley?" Schuldig asked, ignoring the glare he was receiving.

"No. I'm going to stay here and keep an eye on my stocks." Crawford replied simply.

"You make that sound like soap operas or something." Schuldig said with a sigh.

"I'll go get Nagi and we can go." Michiyo said with a smile as she headed off to the teen's room. Sticking her head in the partially open door, she asked. "Nagi-kun, we're going to the mall, want to come?"

Nagi looked up from his computer, quickly minimizing what looked like an e-mail. "Sure, I'll be right out."

"What are you doing anyway?"

"Just…reading fanfics." He said quickly.

"I read this really good one for 'Please Teacher' once." She commented.

Nagi thought about what she said, and got a severe nosebleed.(2)

"You ok, Nagi?" She asked concerned. "Crawford really ought to take you to the doctor. If you're sinuses are this bad, you should be on medication."

* * *

After a quick drive and a hectic time trying to find a parking spot, Michiyo, Schuldig, Farfarello and Nagi entered the mall.

"Nagi-kun…there are a lot of weirdos that come to the mall this time of year." Michiyo began. "Perhaps you should hold my hand…so no one tries to take you."

Nagi blushed while Schuldig mentally laughed. "What if someone tries to take me?"

"They'd bring you back." Nagi said, glaring.

"Behave, or Santa won't bring you anything." Michiyo joked.

"Where is Santa?" Farfarello asked.

"Just follow the sea of munchkins." Michiyo replied, motioning to a long, winding line leading to Santa.

"I don't know why parents allow their children to do this." Nagi commented, still holding Michiyo's hand. "He's nothing but a fat, hairy old pedophilic stalker."

Michiyo laughed. "What do you mean?"

"He's fat and old, and he wears a long bread to keep people from being able to recognize him in a lineup." Nagi continued as the group headed to a store. "What kind of grown up gets his kicks from small children sitting on his lap? And you've heard that song 'He sees you when he's sleeping, he knows when you're awake.' Stalker! Who really believes all of this flying reindeer, gifts to all the girls and boys nonsense anyway?" (3)

"I do." Farfarello sounded almost insulted.

Michiyo laughed nervously. "Why don't Nagi and I get a little shopping done, while you two get in line?"

'Why do I have to?' Schuldig whined mentally.

'Do you want to leave him alone with small children?'

'…Yes…'

'Just go…we won't take long. We'll meet up with you in a minute, and then you can go do whatever you like.'

'Fine…but you owe me.'

With that, thee group split, Farfarello and Schuldig joining the line to see Santa, and Nagi and Michiyo starting for the closest store.

* * *

"Hmm…what to buy…what to buy…" Michiyo pondered, looking around the moderately crowded toy store.

"Who are you shopping for?" Nagi asked.

"Well…I need to get you guys something…and I need to buy some presents for these nice florists I know. One of them is about your age, actually."

Nagi knew exactly who she was talking about. He sweatdropped at the thought of her finding out the truth behind her favorite florists.

"I've got it!" She exclaimed. She released Nagi's hand and bolted down an aisle. "Wait right there, Nagi-kun!"

Nagi sighed, and migrated to a nearby shelf of computer games. 'Hmmm…he'd like this one…' Nagi thought picking up a game. Moving to the checkout line, he kept his eyes peeled for Michiyo. After checking out, he decided to wait for her outside the store, not wanting to deal with small children crying for Barbies.

Michiyo emerged a few moments later. "I didn't see you, and got worried. But the saleslady said you were waiting outside." She smiled, taking her bag in one hand, she took his hand in the other. "What have you got there?"

"A gift for a friend." He replied, blushing slightly.

* * *

Schuldig sighed. The worse thing about waiting in line to see Santa wasn't all the odd looks he and Farfarello were getting, and it wasn't the annoyingly hyperactive thought of all of the small children. No, the worse thing about waiting in line to see Santa, was that most, if not all, of the mothers there were married.

Farfarello looked around, his eyes landing on a young girl about two years old. She had a candy cane and was messily licking at it.

"That looks good." He commented. Reaching down, he snatched it and put it in his mouth, ignoring the girl's cries. "Yuck, strawberry."

With that, he tossed it aside. It landed on a small boy's head, and he too began to cry.

'Mein Gott, Michikins, hurry up.' Schuldig begged.

* * *

"Now all we need to do is stop in the music store, then we can go." Michiyo commented. By now, she had to let go of Nagi's hand so they could both carry their bags. Well, her multiple and his one. "There's Farfarello and Schuldig. Come on, let's meet up with them first"

It was Farfarello's turn to see Santa, and Schuldig was flirting with a female elf.

"So, what do you say…"

"Schuldig…can you give me a hand with these bags? They're awfully heavy." Michiyo called, not liking the look of this woman for some reason. "The Chibi and I are starting to get tired."

The elf looked from Michiyo and Nagi to Schuldig before slapping him across the face. "I don't date married guys." She exclaimed, turning away.

Farfarello stood before an obviously terrified Santa. "Do I get to sit down?"

"Excuse me?" Santa asked.

"I'm supposed to sit on your lap and tell you what I want."

Reluctantly, Santa let him. "And…um…what exactly…do you…um…want for Christmas, Little…er…Big Guy?"

"A new machete and a hockey mask." (4)

"Alright…" Santa said. 'Weirdo!' He thought. "Have you been good this year?"

"Oh yes! I made sure to only do things that make God cry, just like I promised to."

"That's…good…" Santa said, still scared of the Irishman in his lap. "You can go on then. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, Santa." Farfarello grinned at the old man before climbing off his lap, grabbing a handful of candy canes, and walking off to meet the others.

* * *

In the music store, Michiyo was looking over a rack of imported CDs, trying to figure out what Crawford might like.

"Can I help you, miss?" A voice asked.

She turned to look at the man who had spoken. He was very handsome. She blushed slightly.

"Well…" She said, turning to face him.

Schuldig, who had been close by looking over a CD by E Nomine(5), moved to her side. "We've got it covered, thanks." He replied.

"Alright then, I'm here if you need me." The man looked slightly downhearted, but smiled anyway as he walked off.

"What was that for?"

"Payback for earlier." He replied with a smirk.

She shot him the best glare she could muster. "Now how am I supposed to figure out what to get Crawford?"

"He's American, how hard could it be?" He replied before walking away.

Michiyo shrugged before grabbing the first American CD she saw. She added that to her small stack. She glanced at the CD Schuldig had been looking at, and smiled, grabbing it as well.

"Now what?" Nagi asked as they all left the store.

"I go home, and wrap everything." Michiyo replied. "Tomorrow I'll take my friends their gifts."

* * *

"Mission?" Ken asked when Manx entered the shop after closing.

"Not tonight…mostly, just a warning." She replied.

"Against what?" Omi asked.

"Schwarz has a new member, codenamed Pyro."

"Pyro?" Youji asked. "That's odd, even for Schwarz."

"The person more then likely has the ability to control fire." Aya stated.

"Yes, it's a pyrokenetic." Manx replied. "I'm afraid that's all we know at this time."

* * *

Crawford clicked off the TV as he heard the front door open and close. He stood, walking into the hallway to see what everyone was up to. Michiyo carried a ton of bags to her room, and returned a moment later with a smile.

"Did you miss us?" Schuldig asked with a smirk.

"No, I simply wanted to warn you."

"About what?" Michiyo asked.

"Weiss knows about you. I don't know how much they know, but until further notice, you must take someone with you anytime you leave the house."

"Who or what is Weiss?"

"They're this group of assassins that always show up and try to get in our way." Schuldig explained. Personally, I think they're more off then Farf, but that's just me." (6)

"If you just faced one of them, you'd probably be ok…but if it was all four of them, you may not fare as well. Which reminds me…" Crawford motioned for her to follow him as he led the way to the storage room. "It's time I issued you your weapon."

"Weapon? But I thought…" Michiyo began. What did she need a weapon for, wasn't her power enough?

"I don't want you to burn down half of Tokyo during our missions." Crawford replied. "Schuldig and I have guns, Farfarello has his knives, and Nagi…well, the one time we trusted him with a weapon, things didn't go according to plan. You will be using this."

He took something wrapped in black cloth and handed it to her. She set it on a small table in the room, and unwrapped the weapon. It was a shiny silver-grey scythe blade attached to a long chain made of the same metal.

"A chain scythe?" She asked.

"You're lessons will start tomorrow."

"I don't need any." She replied. "I watch Rurouni Kenshin." (7)

Crawford raised an eyebrow.

"I'm joking." She replied with a smile. "When I was a kid, I had an uncle who worked on a farm. He taught my brother and I both how to use them. I was really good with it…after a while.

* * *

AN: Well, I decided that was a good ending place for now. I'll finish up the Christmas thing in the next chapter. Now to explain the references, just incase you didn't get them.

(1) I'm sure you've all heard the song "I'm Dreaming Of A White Christmas" Well, I figured since Schwarz means black in German, this title was both cleaver and fitting.

(2) 'Please Teacher' is an Anime series about this guy who moves in with/marries/falls in love with his teacher. Well, since Nagi's currently living with his teacher, his mind roamed to that teenage boy happy place again, resulting in the nosebleed.

(3) Nagi's Santa rant was inspired by the sheer desire to be ironic, as was Farfie's belief in Santa. As far as the stalker thing…well, that came from a sugar rush…long story…

(4) My brother woke me up one day by turning on the overhead light, and yanking on the cover. Apparently, I gave him a level 5 shi-ne glare or something, because it scared him. Later on he was telling my mom that he expected me to come after him with a machete while wearing a hockey mask (Like Jason, ya know?) After that, it sorta stuck with me.

(5) E Nomine is a kick butt group I defiantly recommend them. They're German rock…at least that's how I describe them.

(6) I love Weiss…and Farfie…but this stems from my mom. She looked at my current desktop wallpaper (Weiss ) and simply stated. "They look gay." I laughed, then she told me she was sure they all had mental problems. My muse and I decided she wasn't too far off there. I love Weiss, but I also love to pick on Weiss.

(7) If you've ever seen the ending credits to Rurouni Kenshin (The dubbed anyway) Kenshin fights a bunch of farmers with chain scythes. It only shows them for a minute, so I thought it would be funny if that was her only experience.


	4. A White Christmas

AN: Here's part two of the Christmas thing. I'm really surprised how quickly these chapters are coming. Perhaps this fic will inspire me on 'Fremdgehen' (My Weiss centered fic).

* * *

Chapter Four – "A White Christmas"

Michiyo exited her room with a large brown paper bag filled with gifts. She was pulling on her coat when she remembered what Crawford had said the night before. Weiss was after her, and she had to take an escort everywhere. A quick sweep of the house told her that Crawford was gone, Nagi was taking a shower, and Schuldig was still asleep. She stuck her head in the small den next to the bathroom and found Farfarello sitting in the dark, save the light from one small window, inspecting his knives.

"You busy?" She asked.

He put down the knife in his hand and watched her intently. "Why?"

"I needed to run an errand, but I'm not supposed to go out alone."

"Where are you going?"

"A little flower shop on the other side of town."

"The Koneko?"

"That's the one. You want to come."

Farfarello smiled. "Sure." He stood, and followed her out, after gathering up his knives and returning them to their hiding places.

* * *

"Aya is cruel." Ken commented.

"Yeah…to make you work on your birthday and all." Omi commented.

"No, not that." Ken replied. "For telling the fangirls it was my birthday."

Youji laughed. "Come on, this is the most attention you've ever gotten from the opposite sex. Enjoy, Kenken."

Ken glared, which had no affect on the playboy. Everyone worked silently until a scream was heard at the back of the crowd of fangirls. The three looked up to see their shop quickly emptying. A moment later, two familiar faces entered. Michiyo approached the counter, Farfarello right behind her.

Youji put a hand on his watch, ready to use his wire if need be. Omi slipped his hand in his pocket, darts at the ready, just in case. Ken mentally cursed himself for being unarmed.

"Michiyo-san…you should come over here…away from him." Ken said, eyes trained on the Irishman. "What do you want?"

"That's not a very nice way to act, Ken-san…" Michiyo replied. "Farfarello is acting as my bodyguard. Apparently an assassin group called Weiss is after me." She gave a small laugh. "Silly, ne? I mean me mentioning that to you…and don't worry, I made him promise he'd behave."

Farfarello wandered away from Michiyo, looking around the shop while Michiyo put the bag of presents on the counter.

"I brought you all Christmas presents." She smiled as she dished them out. "Here's yours, Omi-san…and yours, Youji-san. Where's Aya-san?"

"He's off today." Ken said.

"Alright, well, see that he gets his ok?" She asked and Omi nodded. "And here is yours, Ken-san. One is for your birthday, and the other is Christmas." She was about to fold up the bag when she found another box. "Strange. This one is for you, Omi-san…but I didn't wrap it. It doesn't say who it's from either."

"Thank you very much, Michiyo-san." Omi replied.

"Hey, how about we celebrate the holidays together?" Youji asked with a sly smile.

'Not this again.' She thought with a sigh. She then told the first lie she could think of. "Truth be told, I'm seeing someone."

Farfarello gave a small grunt from the corner of the shop.

"Him?" Youji asked, eyebrow raised.

"No! Like I said, he's just my bodyguard." She then glanced over at Farfarello and noticed for the first time that he had been mutilating flowers. "Farfarello, stop that, I told you to behave!"

"I am behaving…I haven't mutilated any people yet." Farfarello replied simply, finishing with the flower he'd been working on.

"Aya's going to commit murder when he sees those…" Omi said, imagining the redhead's reaction.

"I'll pay for them." Michiyo sighed. "And I need a bouquet for Ranji."

Farfarello returned to her side and sighed. "Mutilating flowers makes God cry…but if you say I have t stop then I will."

Ken blinked in surprise. Berserker, acting calm? He looked toward the window, expecting fire and brimstone. Omi went off to fix up a bouquet, and returned with a nice seasonal piece.

"Thank you, Omi-san, they're beautiful as always." She smiled, paying for the flowers. "I'll see you in a couple weeks. Marry Christmas and Happy New Year."

"Ja, Michiyo-san." The three florists called.

Michiyo started to leave but Farfarello just stood there, glaring at Ken for no real reason except to watch him squirm.

"Come on, Farfarello! Leave poor Ken-san alone."

Farfarello turned and followed her out, a satisfied smile on his face.

"Hey, Michi-san!" Youji called, running to the door and calling after her. "Bring this guy you're seeing next time you come. We need to make sure he's worthy."

"Sure thing, Youji-san." She said with a small nervous laugh. She then added under her breath. "You'll meet him as soon as I do…"

"I wonder why she would think we're after her…" Omi pondered aloud as he began to sweep up the mess Farfarello left.

Ken would've tried t think on the matter, but the fangirls returned, having noticed that the psychotic Irishman was gone.

* * *

Michiyo sighed. "I can't believe you guys don't have a Christmas tree."

"It was never a top priority." Crawford replied dryly.

"I suppose this will have to do." She shook her head as she moved a small, artificial plant, positioning it over the small stack of presents. "Do you at least buy presents for each other?"

"They spend my money all year long, why buy them something for Christmas?" Crawford asked.

"Bah humbug." Schuldig smirked.

Michiyo laughed. "Well, it's a little late to fix that now…but I promise Christmas day will be nice."

"You ought to hang some mistletoe, Michi." Schuldig suggested. "Maybe Nagikins will end up with a little kiss."

Nagi got a small nosebleed, and ran off to his room.

"You ought to be nicer to Nagi." Michiyo scolded, shooting her best glare.

Schuldig was surprised. He actually felt a little bad when she did that.

"If you two are going to carry on, go somewhere else to do it." Crawford sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

* * *

Omi carried his gift up to his room. He'd put the one from Michiyo under the tree, but decided it would be best if the others didn't see the 'mystery' gift. He knew who it was from. Tearing away the paper he smiled as he found a computer Role-Play game. He smiled as he found a small note taped to the box.

_Omi_

_Saw this and thought of you. I hope you don't already have this one. IM me later and we'll discuss our plans for this weekend._

_Nagi_

Omi grinned as he reached over and booted up his computer.

* * *

Farfarello woke up that night to the sound of Gackt playing softly and the smell of…baked goods. Climbing out of his bed, he made his way to the small kitchen. He stopped in the doorway, watching Michiyo take cookies off a baking sheet, and dropping them in a large bowl. She danced in place to the CD as she worked.

"I don't like this song." He commented, causing her to spin around, a cookie partially in her mouth.

"Did I wake you?" She asked, taking the cookie from her mouth. "I'm sorry."

"Isn't it kinda late to bake?"

"I couldn't sleep." She explained. She took a bite of the cookie before turning off the music and moving the bowl of cookies to the table.

"Insomnia hurts God." Farfarello said with a nod. He grabbed a cookie and took a bite. "Good."

"Thanks." She replied. "I always bake when I can't sleep." She gave a small laugh. "It wasn't uncommon for Ranji to wake up in the morning and find cakes and cookies all over the place. And of course, I'd be snoozing at the table by an empty batter bowl."

"What's bothering you?" He asked, noticing the sad look in her eyes.

She thought for a moment. "I just get…sad…this time of year." She explained. "It's Christmas…and Our birthday was a couple weeks ago. And it doesn't help that it was December three years ago that Ranji died." She sighed. "I'm sorry, Farf…I don't want to bother you with this…"

Farfarello took another cookie. "Everyone needs someone to talk to." He stated simply. He stood to go. "Oh, just so you know, I might be crazy, but I do understand. Night, Michi-chan."

With that, Farfarello left, munching on the cookie in his hand. Michiyo smiled slightly, standing and putting her last batch of cookies in.

* * *

After a moderate breakfast, courtesy of Ken, Weiss gathered around their small tree and began to open their presents.

"What'd you get, Omitchi?" Youji asked as the young assassin opened his gift from Michiyo.

"I got a plushie." He said with a smile. "It's Kilala from Inu-Yasha."

"Cute." Ken smiled. "She got me both X-men movies. I wonder how she knew I was a Wolverine fan…"

Youji opened his. "A day planner, so I can keep track of my dates, perhaps?"

All eyes landed on Aya as he opened his gift. Opening the box, he smiled faintly as he picked up a copy of _The Da Vinci Code._

* * *

Michiyo handed her teammates their gifts with a smile.

"Kuroneko-Sama…and the new CD from BoA. Thanks Michiyo-chan!" Nagi said, hugging the older woman.

Farfarello ripped at the paper excitedly. "A new machete?" He looked up from the knife. "No hockey mask? Oh well."

Schuldig smirked. "Kudos…you managed to hide something from the telepath." He then opened his gift, finding the E Nomine CD he'd looked at a few days earlier and a small collection of hair care products.

"I thought you might be able to use that." She said with a smile.

Crawford looked at his gift. Being a Precog, he knew what it was. Opening the package he sighed. "What made you buy me a Backstreet Boys CD?"

"Well…they're American…so I thought you might like them…" She lowered her gaze. "I'm sorry…I can exchange it if you like."

"No that's alright…it's the thought that counts after all."

"Well…I think that's everything…" Michiyo said as she started to stand.

"Not quite Michikins." Schuldig gave a sly smile as Nagi reached into his pocket and held out a small box. Opening it, she smiled to find a set of silver hair clips with sapphire stones.

"You'd better wear them, they were expensive." Crawford said.

"We thought you could use them to hold your hair back during missions." Nagi added with a smile.

"Thank you…all of you…" She smiled. She put them in her hair as she stood. "Pizza ok for lunch?"

All four nodded. She headed to the kitchen to prepare everything for homemade pizzas.

"Hey Michi." Schuldig called. She stopped to look at him. "You're under mistletoe."

"So I am…I'm supposed to kiss someone, right?" She then leaned over and kissed Nagi on the cheek, triggering a small nosebleed. She shook her head and headed on to the kitchen

Recovering quickly, he then grinned at Schuldig. 'Your plan backfired. Jealous?'

'You think you're tough, Chibi? Just wait until tonight.' Schuldig gave an evil smirk.

Nagi knew that smirk…that smirk meant trouble unless he found somewhere safe to sleep tonight. "Michiyo!" Nagi called, running to the kitchen. "Schuldig threatened me. I just know he's going to do something mean tonight."

"You can sleep in my room tonight if that will help." She offered with a smile.

* * *

Nagi sat in Michiyo's queen sized bed, still mentally taunting Schuldig. Michiyo entered the room and climbed onto the other side of the bed. "Comfy?"

"Yup…I don't think Schuldig will bother me tonight."

She covered herself up and gave a small laugh. "Ya know, if we were wearing matching pajamas, this would be just like that scene from 'Please Teacher'."

Nagi blinked before getting a very severe nosebleed. When he didn't stop after a moment, Michiyo got concerned. Jumping up, she bolted into Crawford's room. "Crawford…I think he's broken!"

"What?" Crawford asked, fumbling for his glasses.

"Nagi's having a bad nosebleed."

"What happened?"

"All I did was comment that, with him sleeping in my room, if we had matching pajamas it would be like 'Please Teacher'."

With that, Crawford's nose began to bleed.

* * *

AN: Ok…I know poor Nagi had three nosebleeds in this chapter, and I'm sure you guys are getting tired of the 'Please Teacher' comments. I assure you that Nagi won't have as many nosebleeds from now on, and that…should be the last reference to 'Please Teacher'. That's the last one I've thought of, at least.

To explain the gifts everyone got:

Omi – I actually own a Kilala plushie…and I couldn't help but throw it in. I can just see Omi loving cute things like that.

Ken – I didn't want to give him the same old soccer stuff, and I'm a Wolverine fan myself, so I figured 'why not?'

Youji – I couldn't really think of anything else for him…so I figured at least this he could use.

Aya – I couldn't think of anything that wouldn't send Aya on a month long Angst-Fest. Then I thought 'I bet Aya likes to read…' So I gave him a book that, although I've never read it myself, I heard it was good.

There was less thought involved with Schwarz. I pretty much went 'Hmm... he'd like…' although there is a little symbolism with Nagi and Omi's gifts. Kilala is a white cat, and Kuroneko-sama is a black cat.

Speaking of Nagi and Omi…I couldn't resist the little scene there. I hope it's obvious that Nagi will not be paired with Michiyo…but I might just end up pairing him with Omi. just because Nagi gets nosebleeds from Michiyo doesn't mean he can't like Omi. I figure any teenage guy would nosebleed in his situation, straight or not.

I also couldn't resist giving Crawford a nosebleed…I had to ruin his perfect stick-up-butt persona somehow.

And finally, not to worry, We'll be getting into missions and such in the next chapter, although I might wait a bit before Schwarz and Weiss meet up. Won't that be fun? Ja ne, and please remember to review.


End file.
